Life is messy. Married at 19 foregoing the Navy or college for no other reason than a misplaced sense of responsibility. One love, one lover, one and only through sickness and health til death do we part. Stick by her though she's barren and we adopt. Her maternal needs satisfied, I become disposable. Replaced and … Continue reading Messy
My wife and I have been trying to "make" a baby. This morning is likely our last medically assisted attempt as repeated failed IUI attempts (if today fails as the rest have) will leave only one option that is financially out of reach for us. So we were up early this morning to deliver a … Continue reading IHOP: A Sad Experience.
Most people can recite at least some of Newton's Three Laws of Motion: An object in motion will remain in motion unless acted upon by another force. An object at rest will remain at rest unless acted upon by another force. Force=Mass x Acceleration For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Today … Continue reading Newtonian Laws of Social Motion
It's a bit cliché for anyone to reference "a fire within" or "burning in my soul" or any quasi proverb related to a deep yearning to achieve something or the like. I am well beyond burning, I am more like reactor 5 in Fukushima post tidal wave. Virtually impossible to control the toxic radiation I … Continue reading Man on Fire!
In the wake of the latest school shooting here in America, all of the various societal cogs are spouting their talking points in defense of their particular agendas. Hell, they probably didn't have to dig very far to pull out their scripts as it has become a common theme in our United States of America. … Continue reading Guns or Something Else?
This is one of those posts that attempt to be some sort form of catharsis. An arm, leg, even a car can all be broken. They all can be repaired, fixed and restored to nearly new condition. I've begun to realize that I am not broken, it seems I am something different. When a car … Continue reading Broken…destroyed
There are hundreds, if not thousands of books and websites that discuss the value of being an involved parent. While I can't say I have read all, or even many of them, I'm guessing I won't find solace in their words. My daughter is the most stubborn, headstrong, and maddening people who have ever graced … Continue reading Involved Parenting
Most everything in this world has a purpose. It is defined as the reason for which something exists. What happens when something no longer has a purpose? We throw it away, donate it to a thrift store, or stuff it in the back of a closet. I no longer have a purpose. Not long ago … Continue reading Purpose
Once vibrant, funny, full of life now relegated to a fleshy prison. Solitary confined thoughts creep ever deeper into my cell. Family become visitors, guards, and warden of an unseen pen. No miracle parole. No penance. No escape save for the dark tunnel. The oppressiveness of this place weighs heavier on my soul than any … Continue reading Waiting for Death
It's been months since my ability to walk and work became cripplingly compromised. Going from a physically demanding lifestyle to a sedentary dependency has been one of the most difficult transitions of my life. My days are little more than one continuous cycle of sleep, TV, social media, eat, and repeat. One unexpected side effect … Continue reading Crippling Silence